That's Why It Was A Dollar!!

A friend told me this week that her stomach was hurting.  She said, “I’m not sure why, but maybe it has to do with the food I ate from the Dollar Tree.”

“Wait a minute...you ate food from the ‘Dollar Tree’...what kind of food?”, I asked. I though it had to be some type of candy or chips or something.  At this point, I didn’t even know that the Dollar Tree sold food!  But it wasn’t candy or chips...

“Chicken Nuggets...I had chicken nuggets from the ‘Dollar Tree’.”

I’m in total disbelief.  “Of course your stomach is hurting!  You’re not supposed to eat food from the Dollar Tree!”   I couldn’t bring myself to ask if they had been refrigerated or not.  I’m picturing them on the shelf with tablecloths, discount diapers and some sort of plastic tic tac toe board.  

I would honestly go hungry before I ate ‘food’ from the Dollar Tree.

I picture sitting on a curb and someone asking, “Whatcha eatin'?”  “Dollar Tree Chicken,” I respond.  Fear comes over them.  Panic fills their face.  A frantic 911 call is made, but in the end, my unconscious body is unaware of the help that finally arrives.  In this case, you can’t have your chicken and eat it too.

Another friend of mine told me this week that he had a breakfast sandwich from Starbucks and that it wasn’t that good.  He seemed a little surprised.  “In fact, he said, it was disgusting!”  

Really?  Food from Starbucks wasn’t up to par.  Seems odd, they’ve really placed all of their hope into their food bringing you in to the store.

I tried to explain this to my friends this week and maybe you’ll see where I’m coming from.  This is my general rule of thumb:  You can’t eat at a place where food is not their “main thing” and then be surprised when it turns out to be disgusting.  It’s possible that a “non food store” could have a good food item or two, but it’s very unlikely.  They can’t possibly be good at selling greeting cards and scrambling eggs.

I can’t really go fill up my car with gas and then be surprised when the hot dog, that I purchased from its heated rolling rack, has me praying for the sweet relief of death within 2 hours.  It’s a GAS Station...pun intended.  Why would I think that their food was a “good idea?” Actually, I should be surprised if it didn't cause me some sort of pain!

Should I go into Walgreens and get excited about the sale on Shrimp?  Never gonna happen.

Would I buy steak from the back of my postal carrier’s van?  A milkshake from my cable company?

We never experience this phenomenon in reverse.  I’ve never heard someone telling me about getting windows installed in their house by Burger King.  No one goes to marriage counseling by Subway.

Bottom Line is this...  

1.  Only eat food from grocery stores or from actual restaurants.  

2.  Don’t fill up on food from places that you can fill up your car or from places without refrigeration equipment.

Here’s to your next meal...choose wisely my friend.

Jon