Polite, but Lazy

I noticed something the other day, in my behavior, that has confirmed my previous suspicions about most of us:  We are polite, but lazy.

Just hang with me and see if you won’t agree.

I was delivered the wrong mail the other day.  The mail that I received belonged to one of my neighbors.  I’m polite.  I’m a nice guy.  So with this being true, I really wanted my neighbor to receive the package that had been delivered to my house by mistake.  However, I’m not just polite...I’m lazy too.

This second characteristic means that the package sat on my porch for almost a week.  It’s not that I didn’t want my neighbor to have it . . . I just didn’t want to walk all the way over to his house to take it.  (It had been kind of cold that week)

Being polite finally won out and so I marked “Wrong Address” on the package and put it out for the mail carrier to take next door for me.  He’s going that way anyway. . . right?  When you think about it, he’s getting paid to make those deliveries, so. . . 

So, this prompted me to ask the question:  Am I the only Polite yet Lazy one or are there others?  Could there be . . . an army of us?  Could our numbers be so large that everyone would recognize these characteristics as ones that we each own?

Envision this scene with me if you will:

You are wanting to get on an elevator.  As you approach, the door begins closing.  Being polite, you hate for the others inside the elevator to have to wait for you.  But you don’t really want to wait or take the stairs (because you’re also lazy) so you throw a polite hand up as if to say, “I’ll be there in just a second.”  To further cement your polite intentions, you take a quick jog that lasts for . . . oh, I don’t know . . . 1 step.  (i.e. the same jog you take immediately after you trip as if to pretend that you didn’t)  Being lazy, however, you find that this quick 1 step jog is enough of a gesture to secure your place on that elevator.  Thankfully, others in the elevator share your lazy predisposition and see you as “Really trying to catch the elevator!”  So, they wait for you . . . because they are polite.

Why do we do the 1 step jog?  We don’t really arrive at our destination any quicker do we?  What could possibly prompt us to begin running in the middle of our day while wearing street clothes?  I think it’s because we’re polite, but also lazy.

Need more proof?

Alright - Picture this:

You are walking across the parking lot towards the entrance of your local Target, Mall, Post Office, etc.  As you are getting ready to cross the street in front of the store you see a car approaching.  You’d like to try to go ahead and go in front of the car, but because you are so polite, you don’t want the driver to have to wait for you.  Being polite, you start to jog across the street.  This pleases the driver.  You’re not wasting his time.  You are putting forth some real effort so he doesn’t have to wait.  “How polite”, he may even remark to his traveling companions as he comes to a stop in front of you.  But, alas, you are also quite lazy.  Being lazy, this jog doesn’t last long.  In fact you only jog for . . . oh, I don’t know . . . 1 step.  You certainly aren’t going to overdo it.  You’ve made the effort.  You feel that you have proven your point.  It seems like a win-win, right?

Admit it.  You are a nice person.  You’re polite.  I believe it, you believe it.  Embrace it!

And as long as we are taking an introspective look into the recesses of our souls . . . you’re lazy too, aren’t you?  Come on, you know you are.  You may get up at 5am to work out 6 days a week, but . . . when it comes down to it . . . when it really matters . . . you’re a little bit . . . 

Well, you’re lazy.  Polite, but lazy.  I believe it, you know it to be true.  Embrace it!

We the people, are Polite.  We the people, are Lazy too.

I want to thank you for reading this blog and specifically for reading this latest entry.  Being polite, you wanted to read it because you were trying to be nice to me.  Especially those of you who received the link from me.  Thanks.  I appreciate it. 

Being Lazy, you probably felt it was a bit too long.  You probably even skimmed part of it.  I bet you only skimmed for a second though, because skimming is tough. That’s ok.  I recognize your effort, albeit minimal.  

So, being polite you may forward this on to friends...or being lazy...you may just press delete.

Either way, I’d like to write more today, but . . . I’m feeling kind of lazy.

JJ