Expiration Dates

I never pour a glass of milk without checking the expiration date.  I never eat yogurt (or anything for that matter) without first checking the all important date of expiration.  I value these parameters given to me by the manufactuer.  It gives me a sense of safety and security.  It lets me know when I can proceed with complete confidence and when I should shut it down.

Not only do I appreciate these parameters, but I never argue with them.  I never say, “Even though the date on the milk says its expired, I’m gonna give it a try anyway!”  No way!  If it says it . . . I’m doin’ it!

Why don’t clothing manufactuers give us expiration dates for our clothes?

This seems like an absolutely logical line of thinking.  Just like with food, clothing is made with a certain time frame in mind.  Can it be used after such time period has expired?  Yes, but why would you want to?

I saw a guy the other day wearing a pastel shirt and a white sport coat.  Really?  No, let me just say, “Really?”  When was Miami Vice on . . . 1987?  If you were a Miami Vice fan you may be thinking, “Were his sleeves pushed up?”  My answer to your pleading question would be, “Yes.  Yes they were.”

Yesterday there was a man wearing shorts with long white socks with big stripes at the top.  Wow!  He would have been totally groovy in the 1970s, but . . . now?  I have a picture of me wearing such socks in 1982 and, even then, I think I was a few years past the expiration date.  What were these guys thinking?  What was I thinking?

These guys actually went to their closet and said to themselves, “Should I pull this little gem out today.  Why, yes I should.  This will be perfect for today.”

If you know me, you know that I am not on the cutting edge of fashion.  I’m not exactly an expert.  I don’t have to be an expert, however, to see some things that make me nervous.  We’ve all seen people wearing some things that any expiration date should just simply say, “Never”.  These are items that have never been a good idea.  Below are the:

     

    Top Ten Things That You Should Never Wear:

10.  A winter hat with the furry ear flaps

  9.  Dress Shoes with No Socks

  8.  Sunglasses turned backwards on the back of your head or neck

  7.  Shorts, Dress Shoes and Black Socks.  

  6.  A beret (unless you are special forces...even then, let’s not wear it too often)

  5.  A Sweater draped and Tied Over Your Shoulders

  4.  Anything a size too small or a size too big

  3.  Anything with writing across the rear

  2.  Leg Warmers or anything else you might have seen worn on “Glee”

And the Number One Thing That You Should Never Wear is...

        Spandex...anything

Hope you’ve enjoyed reading today.  If you happen to be wearing numbers 8, 7 and 6 all together today ... just go with it.  If you move forward with enough confidence, maybe you’ll start a new trend.

JJ